Tuesday, May 19, 2009

He opted out on his own

My son is in fourth grade this year. He only fairly recently started complaining about feeling left out sometimes - maybe in the last couple of years. In the past he never complained at birthday parties about why he couldn't eat the ice cream and cake. He just ate his candy and graham crackers or Italian ice or whatever. For his own birthdays I usually bake an egg and dairy free cake, but he doesn't eat it. He acts all excited about it and takes that first piece, eats a bit and leaves the rest. I haven't had to worry about cheese substitutes and alternative baked goods because he didn't complain about not having them and he has never gotten familiar with the tastes of rich ice cream, buttery baked goods, cheese, etc. He does like soy butter, and in more recent years has developed a taste for soy ice cream. He likes Italian Ice better though.

But despite his relative lack of complaining and his long-standing acceptance of his allergy situation, I was still surprised when I found out that he had decided not to go on a class field trip. He didn't even tell me his decision. I overheard another kid in his class talking to him about it and he said he wasn't going.
"What?" I asked, "You aren't going?"
"No. They are going to be near a peanut farm and it is the HEIGHT of peanut season."

Well, it is not exactly the HEIGHT of peanut season but it is the beginning of the growing season. The class would be visiting an outdoor museum where they reenact early colonial life and it is located in peanut farm territory. His teacher had told me earlier in the year that they would be going on this trip. I had decided I would probably go on the trip with the class, take Benadryl and an Epi-pen, and be prepared to leave early if it seemed necessary. I figured he would probably be okay if he didn't go into the peanut field and they weren't harvesting.
But my son decided not to go. He didn't want to risk it. I honored his decision and I was proud of him. He is already taking charge of his own health and well-being. This makes me feel much better about the future when he goes off to college and out on his own.

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